Tuesday, April 27, 2010

04/27/10 - The Culture of Facebook

Have any of you had hurt feelings over something posted on Facebook? Have any of you gone searching for a friend and discovered they "de-friended" you? Has someone made a comment that really didn't make sense or seem like them?

Ah, Facebook! I really do enjoy Facebook, I love connecting with friends and making new friends.

But Facebook can be hurtful, harmful, and destroy friendships and relationships.

Like anything in life we must be balanced in our approach to Facebook. It shouldn't replace real life conversations with friends. It shouldn't replace reaching out to new friends at school, work, or church. It shouldn't replace face to face interaction with those we live with.

Facebook should be look at as a tool of communication. Not the only tool in our "relationship tool box", but A tool. If there's been miscommunication in real life, we should seek to correct it and the same goes for Facebook.

So for all the positives of Facebook we must seek to avoid the negative effect it can have on relationships.

Monday, April 26, 2010

04/26/10 - Emotionally Modest

Someone asked me what it means to be emotionally modest after my post a couple of weeks ago.

As I've thought about her question these phrases and ideas came into my head:

An emotionally modest person:
  • understands what boundaries are
  • knows what's appropriate to share and what's sharing too much
  • understands that that circle of intimate friends is small
  • can control their emotions when necessary
  • knows what a "safe" friend is and can share honestly and openly with that person

In our culture of Facebook, Twitter, texting, blogs...etc...people have become desensitized to boundaries. We've become a culture of "over sharing". So when I think of someone who is emotionally modest, they understand that the "hidden person of the heart" is not for the world to see, but a select group of safe, close confidants.

Hope this helps! And remember, these are just my thoughts on the matter! I am far from perfect and not the final authority on this issue! ;-)

Monday, April 19, 2010

04/19/10 - Creating an Atmosphere

In our marriage and in our home I believe God has uniquely equipped me to bring an atmosphere of love, tenderness, acceptance, and safety to my husband and children. I believe that God has given this ability to women to be the "love makers" of their home. To be that safe place for their husbands to "fall".

In our culture women's tender emotions have been trampled upon by the feminist movement. We've been told to be strong, fearless, and bold. I have seen first hand how that attitudes removes this tenderness and compassion.

We get so wrapped up in protecting ourselves, our rights, our attitudes, we forget we are to be the tender women God created us to be.

I believe in allowing God's grace to flow through me in the tender, compassion manner I am strong, I am protected, I am free.

Why must be do things so opposite of God's ways! His ways are set up to protect us, not to harm us!

(Mary Kassian gave a talk on True Woman '08 about how the feminist movement grew, I belive it's helpful in understand why women do what we do. Hope you enjoy watching the video HERE)

Saturday, April 17, 2010

04/17/10 - Emotionally Modest

What does it mean to be emotionally modest?

Does it mean you never speak to anyone of the opposite sex? Does it mean you avoid all contact with guys? Does it mean you're scared to death of even opening up any emotions to young men (or young women if you're a guy)?

I don't think so!

Being emotionally modest mean you understand your own boundaries. You understand what's appropriate to share and what is inappropriate to share. You know your own heart and motives behind being emotionally connected with someone.

It takes work to be emotionally modest. It's not easy. It's totally counter-cultural! But oh so worth it!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

04/13/10 - Planet Mom

I wrote this article for a MOPS newsletter. I just thought I'd share it here. It may or may not apply to you, but here's some of my thoughts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Planet Mom

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit,
but with humility of mind regard one
another as more important than yourselves
Philippians 2:3


Life on Planet Mom can be the greatest joy and the biggest challenge any of us will face. Motherhood is not for the faint of heart and most of us really don’t know all mothering entails the first time we hold our newborn. Yet, we’re surviving, breathing, thriving, and enjoying Planet Mom!

Self
As a mom, when I find myself the most annoyed, frustrated, irritated, or stressed out with my kids, I can normally point that attitude back to myself. Not just who I am, but my selfishness that comes from being human. In a nutshell, when I am not getting my way, I am not fun to be around!
Being a mom and being selfish don’t go hand in hand, if they do you will find yourself being very discontent on Planet Mom. Self can get in the way of really thriving on Planet Mom.

Our Culture
We live in a society that saturated with self. Everyone is looking out for number one. When you put yourself above your relationship with God, your husband, or your kids you will be frustrated. We told in the bible to “do nothing from selfishness”. (Phil 2:3 NSB) Do nothing! That’s a tough pill to swallow when we’re feeling overwhelmed with the demands that motherhood brings.

The Balance
In saying we must put others first I know your thoughts are, “Well, if no one is taking care of me, I’ll get lost in being a wife or a mom.” We’re not to get lost in anything we do, but who we are in Christ. When we look at mothering or being a wife through the lens of Christ and through His example of service to others, we see the balance.
Christ often took time to be with His Father, to renew Himself spiritually with God. But Christ poured out His life for people over and over and over. When He was tired He still gave. When He wanted a break and someone needed Him, He gave. But again, He knew time with His Father was the key to renewal.
As moms we must follow His example. In order to feel renewed and refreshed, it’s important that we take care of our spiritual needs. Taking care of our spiritual needs will rejuvenate our batteries for our husbands and our children.

Retreat

If you’re feeling drained spiritually and you’re barely surviving on Planet Mom, then I’d suggest you take time and "get away" with God. If you have the time and resources, I'd recommend a retreat. But if that's not possible, get a few hours away and alone with you and the Lord. If even a few hours isn't possible, take 30 minutes to have some quiet time with God. We all have 30 minutes, we just have to prioritize.
Getting away and taking care of that spiritual need will help you be a better wife and mom!