In a recent conversation with a close friend we were processing through an issue. She was trying to figure out the best way to confront another friend on a issue.
At one point my friend said something along the lines of, "We live in a culture that when you try to hold someone accountable, you are taken as being judgemental." We stayed on this topic for awhile and we both agreed that since we live in a culture where everything is morally relevant, anytime you confront sin, you risk the chance of being taken as judgemental and/or hypocritical.
What is the line between accountability and being judgemental?
As I've thought about this conversation, I've come to the conclusion that a lot of it comes to our own heart when wanting to "confront" someone with a sin issue. Are we looking to be heard? Or are we sincerely looking out for the spiritual well being of the person we are confronting?
We are not the Holy Spirit for people, yet we are to be "iron sharpening iron" with our brothers and sisters in the Lord. This takes a willingness to know when to act, when to speak, and when to be silent. We must have our own hearts pure before we start "confronting" others with sin issues.
I also firmly believe you have to have a relationship built with someone before you being to show them the error of their ways. Those who are closest to me, have the greatest impact when they confront me. Yes, I've had others who I hardly know confront me on issues and my human nature is to respond in...well it's not pretty the thoughts I've had. It felt more like them judging me without knowing the full story, than them trying to guide me in my walk with God.
All of this takes our own walk with God to be real and authentic. If we don't have that, then we can come across as judgemental and hypocritical.
What are your thoughts on this?