Tuesday, March 4, 2008

03/04/08 - More Thoughts on pain

Yesterday I responded to a comment from a previous post.

I realize that there are many people who will read this who are dealing with past pain in their lives that are causing them to not function to their greatest potential today!

I do have a degree in Social Work and part of my masters in Christian Counseling finished (got married and had kids!) When someone has had a traumatic event in their life (death of parent, separation/abandonment of parent, physical or sexual abuse) a person can tend to remain emotional at that age.

So if a parent died at age 9, a person can tend to remain emotional a nine year old. I don't say this to sound harsh, but it's reality. Unless a person works through the emotions, feelings, and results of a traumatic event this is the reality they live in.

The filter they view the world is one of the emotions they felt at that age.

I remember when I learned this concept, it was life changing. I was able to view people with a better perspective as to why they were acting or respond to those around them. I was able to have compassion on them and grace for them to work through whatever issues need to be examined.


Anonymous said...

Heather, God must have given you those words just for me.
My Mom died thursday, february 28th. we held the funeral yesterday. I am almost 15 years old, and not ready to be on my own without a mom... but like you said, we have to move on.
keep the good work up, God is using you in amazing ways.

In Christ,

Heather Paulsen said...


God bless you sweetheart! Oh my heart is so sad for you. I will pray that as you move through this season of grief that God will give you what you need!