Thursday, June 14, 2007


What makes a blog a good blog? What draws people to a blog? How do blogs influence people? How do video's on youtube get spread to millions of computers in a matter of days? How is this generation of myspace and youtube influenced? What brings people back to a blog?

These are questions I have for you, the reader of my blog!

As an author I desire personal contact with my readers...hence my blog. I want to know what people think about my book. I want to know how it has impacted their lives...if it has at all.

Thanks for reading and for helping me out!

Monday, June 11, 2007


Five years ago when I'd search "Emotional Purity" on about three pages would come up. Now there's over 9,000 web sites with the term "emotional purity"!

When I google: "emotional purity and Heather Paulsen", there are over 100 web site and this is where it gets interesting. I enjoy seeing what people have written about my book...the good, the bad and the ugly! People pick apart one phrase of the book and write a whole blog about that one sentence. It's so easy for the written word to become distorted or misunderstood. I guess this just goes along with being a writer!

Although I want to defend myself, I'll let God do that. What I love reading are threads on message boards where my name/book come up! It's neat to see the dialog of people wanting to understand emotional purity in their own lives.

Also, for those of you with old editions of Emotional Purity let me encourage you to check out the new edition. I self-published the first edition and did not have any professional editor to work with me. With the new edition, not only have I added a new chapter and a whole lot more information, I had an editor (actually four) working with me!

Thanks for all your comments!

Saturday, June 9, 2007

Order talk

If you'd like to order the talk I gave at the ICHE Convention, go to, click on "Conventions". You'll see at the top right hand of that link a box that says, "2007 Convention Audio Recording - Order now". I am under "Friday Second Session" list. It's my married name: Heather Patenaude - Singlemindness #47


Emotional Puirty

I see emotional purity as the root of physical purity. The more emotionally connected you are with someone, the more you are (or desire) physical connected!

A few years ago I weeded a garden as a work project with some friends. Well, we didn't weed the garden, we just basically trimmed the weeds. I remember when we were all done thinking that: yes, the garden did look a lot better, but I knew we didn't get all the roots so it would be just as weedy in just a matter of months.

We all have heard that God's Words directs us to remain physically pure for the marriage relationship, yet at the very core of staying physically pure is a deep conviction to remain emotionally pure.

Once a couple begins to attach emotionally; physical affection is naturally going to follow. This is even true of friends. Once you get to know someone better (even someone of the same gender) you may be more willing to give a hug, pat on the back, touch them when you talk...ect. These are all non-sexual ways of touching, but most of us are not this way with people we don't know.

So in opposite sex friendships a guy and girl can become emotionally close and start having long extended hugs, hand/food/back massages, kiss on the forehead or cheek, or cuddle together. This may be just "friendly" physically contact, but this should be saved for a committed relationship.

What would you think if you saw a married woman cuddling with her best friend's husband or giving a back massage to a co-worker? If you would not do these things as a married person, why do them while you are single?

In my book I give the plumbline questions I asked myself when I was single in order to maintain emotional purity. One of those is: Would I treat him this way if he was a married man? So if you are questioning your own "physical" contact with a friend ask: would I do this if he were married?

In Christian single circles I have seen how these "innocent" physically interactions are very common and accepted. Our bodies belong to our mates, not our friends.

I found that remaining physically pure for my husband a whole lot easier once I committed my life and my heart to emotional purity!